The challenges of being a daddy

One of the things that I'm most excited about with having a baby is the chance to see my husband as a daddy. I've known from very early on in our relationship that my husband will be an AMAZING father. He has unending patience and is really willing to do all of the fun and not-so-fun parts of being a parent. In fact, he is going to be a stay-at-home dad, which is relatively common of fathers at the company where I work. While it's nowhere near as stay-at-home moms, there are plenty of dads who stay home with their kids at this company.

The part that makes me sad, though, is the total lack of support the greater society gives to dads in general, and especially to stay-at-home dads. For example:

1) Very few baby products address the needs of fathers. As an example, we were lucky enough to receive a high chair for Christmas (thanks Grandma!). On the box, there was a list of features "For Baby" and a list of features "For Mom." Why couldn't it say "For Parents"? It's like dads don't matter.

2) Dads don't get a vote in decision-making with child choices. We've decided to donate our child's cord blood to a public bank. In order to do this, you need to call the cord bank and request a collection kit. My husband called today, and THEY WOULDN'T GIVE IT TO HIM. I have to call. I'm still furious about this one.

3) When moms take care of their kids, it's parenting. When dads take care of their kids, it's "babysitting."

4) At many restaurants, there is a changing table in the women's restroom, but there isn't one in the men's restroom. In those situations, I suggested to my husband that he change the baby on one of the tables in the restaurant. His idea was to look around the restaurant for a baby with a clean diaper, and swap them.

5) When I tell people we're having a boy, one of the responses I get is "Oh, your husband must be so happy!" While it's certainly true that he's thrilled, he also would have been thrilled if it were a girl. He's just happy we're having a healthy child.

6) Dad's are regularly disinvited from playgroups. That is, if a group of moms gets together to have their kids play together, dads are discouraged from attending. In fact, they're often specifically told not to come.

I realize that I'm lucky to have such an involved husband, but I also know that he's far from the only one. Why isn't there more support out there for dads?

Unbelievable. I guess I'm just in a feminist mood this evening.